HELP ME

I need scholarship money. I'm just not going to lie and put myself out there. I know that almost every parent with a college-aged child needs scholarship money, grants, federal aid, etc. I need it too.

Please vote for my scholarship essay!!

The essay is about "What is the most important lesson you have learned in your life?"
I talked about how my parents were divorced when I was really young, and then, I know that because of my dad, I became this quiet little thing that really didn't trust anyone outside of family. My father drank. He smoked (and I think he still smokes, if he's alive that is. I haven't heard from him in so long, I'm honestly not sure if he's alive or not.) He gambled away all the money that my mom earned. Sometimes even my grandparents had to chipped in because he would waste all the money gambling, womenizing, drinking, smoking...

It's not hard to see why I didn't trust people for a very long time, especially men. I hated guys. I had no trust or respect for them. I just thought they were all idiots. I seriously hate them. I feel that, especially in middle school, I was so rude and mean to guys. I was okay to other gals, but to guys? I pretty much ignored them whenever they would talk to me. Sometime I MIGHT give a one-word answer. The most I ever talked was group projects - I kind of didn't have a choice.

[The me now really feels sorry for the guys that tried to ask me out in middle school. I not only said 'no,' but on the inside I was also thinking, "Who is this idiot trying to ask me out?" Like I said, I was so mean. Most of all though, I feel sorry that they had fallen for the me then. Seriously! I hate the middle school me. She was such a jerk and rationalized it by thinking, "I'm shy. I just don't want to talk to anyone." Okay... but talk to people when they talk to you!!!  That is definitely something that I would say to my middle school me: "STOP HATING EVERYONE ELSE'S GUTS!! I HATE YOUR GUTS!! GROW UP AND GO TALK TO A HUMAN BEING!!!!!!! I HATE YOU! ... By the way, I'm you from the future..." I think I would scare the middle school me... Good...]

Then, I went to high school, the most dreaded step from adolescent-hood to adulthood. The time of prom/ball, girlfriends and boyfriends everywhere, harder classes, soon to apply for college, pimples and acne... The Hell for geeks, nerds, and that quiet people like me that don't know how to fight back or stand up for themselves. Some dreamers from these categories dream, or think,. of high school as a new beginning. It will be the time to reinvent myself. "I, the quiet nerd, will become an awesome popular people and people will love me!!" I wasn't one of those types. I just thought that this quiet existence of being teased and made fun of would be the rest of my life. I had no real fight in me.
Then, I met them. I met this annoying group of people that seem to know exactly how to drive me out of my mind. They are loud and obnoxious and occasionally rude. There are a lot of Asian jokes, Black/racist jokes, Blond jokes, Sexist jokes, and pretty much any rude, racist/classist/sexist jokes you can think of, flying around (mostly directed at a friend or themselves). The guys love to roughhouse and horse around; mostly, they like to reenact 'cool' scenes from boxing/fighting/wrestling/death match video games They are pretty much everything I hate. They are nothing like me. There is only one way I know how to describe them: "my friends." These quirks and weirdness that I hate? I've come to love them. They make me laugh. I can even laugh at their Asian jokes. I really don't find them offensive; they're hilarious! Their reenactment scenes are hysterical! Ever seen a really tall guy try to die in slow motion, trying to 'slowly' fall to the floor and then totally fail? Ever seen guy acting out video game cut scenes with narration and sound effects? yeah... I love them.

What else can I say? They accepted me as I am. They make me believe the world is not that bad. They fill my silences with chaos. They replaced my loneliness with love. They replaced my hatred with trust. They taught me the most important lesson that I have learned in my life: Trust.

I trust them wholeheartedly. I would give my life for them. They are everything that I am. They are everything that made me who I am today.
I love you guys.
Saranghaeyo.

This post was written by: Korean Lovers

Korean Lovers is a professional blogger korean Addict, web designer and front end web developer. Follow him on Twitter